Issue 061

April 2010

MMA boasts a commendable track record of post-fight sportsmanship, but there are a few times when post-fight scuffles, freak-outs and assorted shenanigans hit the headlines. Such events are often decried as being ‘bad for the sport’. Andrew Garvey fails to see the logic in that argument, as any prospective fan or advertiser willing to take a look at a sport where two men fight in a cage is unlikely to be put off by bad language or a bit of pushing and shoving. This month, he proudly presents a selection of the funniest, most outrageous post-fight shenanigans of all time. 

1 The Hammerhouse vs Chute Boxe

Pride 31: February 26, 2006, Tokyo, Japan

Immediately following Mark Coleman’s stunning, injury-assisted win over heavy favorite Mauricio ‘Shogun’ Rua, all hell broke loose. Flinging aside the intervening referee, Coleman got in Murilo ‘Ninja’ Rua’s face – sparking off a wild melee that saw Hammerhouse regular Phil Baroni go after Chute Boxe superstar Wanderlei Silva, with Coleman treading on ‘The Axe Murderer’s’ neck, and even Coleman’s indestructible 66-year-old dad getting involved. The fun and games continued backstage with a corridor argument between the two camps, and then Coleman’s breathless, purple faced, profanity-laced interview for the cameras. Fantastically entertaining shenanigans.

2 Josh Koscheck vs the fans 

UFC 69: April 7, 2007, Houston, Texas, USA

Koscheck’s most memorably hilarious post-fight interview is the perfect case study for anyone who understands that, in MMA, it’s often better (and more lucrative) to be passionately hated than more generally liked and respected. Emerging from his much-anticipated but appallingly dull grudge-fight with Diego Sanchez with a unanimous decision win, Koscheck celebrated in style – his arms spread wide, a goofy look of glee on his face, a baseball cap at a jaunty angle atop his bleached blond hair. The fact that thousands of fans were booing him out of the building was of no consequence whatsoever. He flatly told them he didn’t care if people loved or hated him, repeatedly mocked the defeated Sanchez’ no-longer-unbeaten record and generally acted like he was the greatest man that ever lived. What a bad guy!  

3 Nick & Nate Diaz vs Hawaii

EliteXC: Return of the King: June 14, 2008, Honolulu, Hawaii, USA

Surprisingly stopped on cuts by KJ Noons seven months earlier, Nick Diaz (at the behest of EliteXC) entered the cage, after local boy Noons’ triumphant homecoming win over Yves Edwards, to issue a challenge for a rematch. The ever-disrespectful Diaz telling Noons “Don’t be scared, homey”, was enough to kick off a wild scene that included Noons’ former pro kickboxer dad, Nick’s little brother Nate, and what seemed like a few dozen locals pushing and a-shoving while challenges, insults and water bottles went flying. Then, to cap off one of the most memorable scenes in EliteXC’s short, mismanaged history, the Diaz boys were hustled out of the cage, only to back out of the arena with Nick flipping off everyone in sight while Nate flung his arms and hands around in all kinds of wacky hand-signals. The partisan crowd bayed for Diaz blood. Bad for the sport? Never. Entertaining? Incredibly.e

4 Junie Browning’s latest escapade 

MMA Big Show: November 28, 2009, Florence, Indiana, USA

Recently dropped UFC fighters often appear on low-level Internet pay-per-views that fly well below the mainstream attention, but none have ever given quite the same post-fight performance as The Ultimate Fighter 8 ratings magnet Browning. Fired by Dana White less than two months previously for a prescription-drug fueled hospital rampage, Browning was booed vociferously from the outset, won his fight, then told the audience, “I try to come out here and put on a show. If you don’t like it, then fuck y’all!” The ever-quotable Junie then finished off with, “Ladies, after this I want two lines, one for sucking and one for fucking.” Classy.  

5 Brock Lesnar vs Bud Lite 

UFC 100: July 11, 2009, Las Vegas, Nevada, USA

Most likely everyone reading this has seen Brock’s now-legendary UFC 100 post-fight freak-out, but it’s more than worth recapping. Getting in vanquished foe Frank Mir’s misshapen, bloodied face, flipping off the booing audience, announcing his plans to celebrate with a Coors Lite (as major corporate sponsor Budweiser “won’t pay me nothin’”) and maybe even have sex with his wife, was apparently all too much for the more delicate of MMA journalists and fans. Read the riot act by an aghast Dana White, Lesnar apologized at the post-fight press conference for what was, in so many ways, one of the funniest things to ever appear on a UFC pay-per-view.